Destiny
by Hyperiongirl
Summary: Hermione has an accident at the ministry of magic whilst on her way to a hearing regarding the return of you know who, the accident involves a ageing potion that makes her around 20, the potion is for the time being not reversible.
1. Default Chapter

Title: Destiny

Author name: Hyperiongirl

Author email: Romance/drama  
Spoilers: SS/PS, CoS, PoA, GoF, OOTP

Keywords: Sirius Hermione  
Rating: R

Summary: Hermione has an accident at the ministry of magic whilst on her way to a hearing regarding the return of you know who, the accident involves a ageing potion that makes her around 20, the potion is for the time being not reversible.

She is sent to stay with Sirius for her own protection, as she can't continue with school until the ageing is reversed. With the battle between Lord Voldemort and the order is raging on Hermione must try and carry on with her studies with Sirius playing the reluctant tutor. Thrown together in Grrimould place Hermione and Sirius become increasingly close as the solitude from the outside world engulfs them, forcing them to take solace in each other's company. Hermione begins to feel trapped and helpless, A feeling Sirius knows only too well, and one that almost cost him his life not so long ago.

This is their story, Its about trust, fear, love, hatred, and destiny.

**Chapter one **

**The ministry of magic**

Hermione was running, very quickly. She was late for the hearing at the ministry of magic.

Hermione had been requested as a witness to relay the event s of the fateful night Sirius had been killed. Or as they had believed that night killed.

Sirius had been gone for several months when Albus Dumbledore had summoned Harry, Ron and Hermione to his office and told them there had been a sighting of Sirius in Africa. At first nobody believed it to be true, How could it be? But much to the delight of joy of everyone it was true.

The night Sirius had disappeared behind the veil to his death, as all believed, he had in fact been transported to another archway.

This archway was hidden in a remote cave, unknown to humans and wizards alike for many, many years. Sirius had appeared not knowing his name or where he had travelled from.

The chamber of death would have all most certainly claimed him permanently if it had not been for the fact he had been forced into it by an other, Bellatrix Lestrange to be precise.

The chamber would only claim those permanently that crossed over of there own will, and as this was not the case with Sirius it had unceremoniously spat him back out again.

After several weeks Sirius had been bought back to number twelve Grimould place and had preceded to rest and gradually regain his memory. Sirius was weak and in the first few weeks in need of constant attention but after a while he began to get stronger and more like his old self.

Harry was of course beyond overjoyed to be reunited with his godfather and Hermione and Ron were pleased for Harry and Happy themselves, as they two had grown attached to Sirius.

The hearing was about to start and Hermione was racing toward the lift. "I'm late, how on earth will this look to everyone. ME Hermione Granger late"

As she approached the lift she realised it was the same lift they had all travelled in the night of Sirius's supposed death. It had seemed so loud and clanking as it descend. Of course the ministry had been deserted that night. Not like now Hermione thought as people bustled around her, dashing in and out of rooms and corridors.

As she entered the lift to descend to the dungeon she ran straight into a small older than average looking wizard who was carrying a flask of dark red liquid, the moment Hermione collided with the wizard the liquid seemed to fly into the air above her head in slow motion and crash down upon her with an almighty thud.

Hermione wobbled on her feet for a moment and tried in vain to rub away the red gooey substance that ran down her face "argggh" Hermione cried.

The old wizard looked quite worried "WH, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE" the wizard shouted giving

Hermione a look so unnerving Hermione felt positively frantic "What is it, what on earth have you just spilled on me…WHY are you looking at me like that"

Just then Hermione started to feel a very odd tingling feeling creeping up her legs past her waist moving upwards to her neck, then face and at last the light from the building seemed to dim and Hermione realised somewhat too late she was falling to the fall.

Everything went black.

Some time later Hermione started to awaken from her magically induced slumber. Slowly opening her eyes and trying to adjust to her surroundings she realised she was in a bed. Not just any bed but a bed in a ward. A ward at none other than St. Mungo's.

Albus Dumbledore looked down at Hermione with a kindly expression "Well here you are miss Granger, and not a moment to soon, You have visitors waiting to see you…I just wanted to have a little talk with you first, before you see anyone"

Hermione sat up, still feeling groggy and unbalanced. "Oh..Professor" she exclaimed rather quietly "Wha, what's going on? I'm late for the hearing" she tried in vain to pull herself up further as if making an attempt to get out of bed.

Dumbledore smiled serenely at her "There's really no need for you to worry about that now miss Granger, its all been taken care of. In fact it all went rather well as I'm sure Harry will explain to you later"

Dumbledore looked around as if to see if anyone was listening. "I'm sure you may remember running into my colleague at the ministry"

Hermione looked at Dumbledore with a slow recognition "yes I er, Yes I do. He spilt his potion on me and then, then…. I don't remember"

Dumbledore smiled yet again and placed himself on the corner of the bed " Miss Granger, I don't really know how to say this but" he paused momentarily "do you not notice anything different about yourself"

Hermione looked panic stricken, Images of cat ears and fur flashed in front of her eyes as she desperately felt her head and face "Oh no" but as soon as she began to feel her face she stopped and frowned. Slowly she began to feel her face and then she looked down at her body. Hermione's face became a blush of crimson and she realised she was looking down at her body, not the body she had woken with that morning though, this body resembled one of a full grown woman with curves in apparently all the right places. "ARGHHHHH" she shrieked staring at Dumbledore who's expression had yet to change.

Dumbledore pulled out a small mirror from his robe pocket and handed it gracefully to Hermione "You see miss Granger, the problem is the potion that was er how shall I say, inadvertently spilled onto you was in fact a rather new potion my old colleague had been preparing, yes one in fact that had yet to be passed by the regulatory board"

Hermione was staring into the mirror now not really aware of Dumbledore's speech "In any case miss Granger the potion was, is being designed to help with ageing disorders as well as other more interesting uses, and as I'm sure you are now aware you have apparently aged oh lets see" Dumbledore paused as if to count "Er yes id say your now at least 20"

Hermione was still entranced at her own reflection in the mirror. Looking back at her now was a woman. A woman who actually looked rather attractive, her normal bushy hair had at last seemed to be calmed and looked quite sleek, her face more defined, lips somewhat fuller.

Hermione finally looked back to Dumbledore with a look of almost speechlessness "Well how long will it last for? I mean it's actually nice to see what I will look like in the future but also quite frightening"

Dumbledore's smiled now faltered ever so slightly "Well this is the thing miss Granger, I'm rather afraid that my colleague has not yet had the chance to modify this particular strain of ageing potion and well, for the time being at least it's not reversible"

Hermione gasped "NO" she looked back to the mirror yet again as if to make certain what she was seeing "You..You" tears began to fall rapidly from Hermione's face "You mean I might not ever be, well be me again"

Dumbledore looked around the ward as if searching for inspiration "Now look here, everything will work out just fine miss Granger you have my word" he bent down to her face and spoke in a somewhat hushed tone "All will work out in the end, In fact some would rather relish the chance to be older than there years for a little while at least"

Hermione didn't look so sure "well I don't know about EVERYONE" she began to shout getting more and more anxious by the moment. Dumbledore simply smiled "Hermione Granger everything will be fine as I've promised. It will however take some time to remedy this situation and until then I suggest you stay with Sirius at the order headquarters"

Hermione looked panic stricken "Why? I should be back at Hogwarts" she began to sniffle again.

Dumbledore straitened his back again "the potion that has been used is something that the ministry has been working on for several months, Something that when developed may have a great use in the Orders fight as well as the ageing disorders of which I spoke earlier. I'm afraid I can't allow you to return to Hogwarts in your present state, as it would unfortunately alert people to this situation. People who may use this information for there own dark means, I'm sure you understand that I shall say no more on the matter at this precise moment"

Dumbledore stood slowly still smiling "Harry and Ron have been informed about your condition and of course I will relay the news's to your parents as soon as I can contact them without fear of interception" he turned to walk away and paused looking around once more "you will of course be more than able to keep up your studies, In fact Sirius will be able to assist you, and I dare say you him. He is still finding it hard adjusting after his reappearance and as your no doubt aware letting Harry go to him is an impossibility at this moment in time"

Hermione looked up and smiled weakly, at least her studies wouldn't suffer that was surly something. And Sirius did need help at his horrid house in Grimould place, and at least Creature was no longer there to spy on him and the orders business. "Yes professor, I know your right of course its just..ju, just a shock that's all. You will let me know straight away if a reverse potion is made available wont you, I, er, I'm just finding this all a little hard to get to grips with that's all" Hermione forced a smile and nodded her goodbye to Dumbledore as he turned to leave.


	2. Chapter Two

Thanks to those who reviewed, I'm new to this so if my wording is off, or if I've misspelled stuff I apologise and will try to get it remedied soon as! I will be re working this constantly!

Please review and let me know if its making sense! Thanks!

Chapter two

Grimould times ahead

Sirius Black stirred in his sleep. The dreams had become intense again and the feeling of doom was as ever impending. He woke finally with a start to see Tonks smiling down at him "Bloody hell Tonks! WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DO THAT TO ME" he roared.

Tonks stood grinning, her hair was a vivid green and she appeared to be wearing a Muggle concoction of over layered T-shirts with jeans and a short skirt over the top. Each garment in brighter colour than the last "Oh okay Sirius but honestly its almost mid afternoon why your still sleeping is beyo…"

Sirius cut her off dead "If I want to spend every day sleeping it's my place to do so! Or have the order now taken it upon themselves to monitor my every move and bodily function" Sirius grinned Sardonically.

Tonks just laughed " Honestly Sirius" she spoke with a strong northern accent "I'm just here to tell you that you will soon be having company to stay"

Sirius jumped excitedly "HARRY? He's coming here? I thought Dumbledore had said he couldn't come for the time being"

Tonks walked over to the grime stained window and pulled back the curtains further allowing spliced steams of light to force there way into the darkened room. "Well I'm sorry to say Sirius it's not Harry that will be joining you".

Sirius looked up at Tonks half covering his eyes at the rude intrusion of the light "Well who the hell is coming here? Don't tell me Moonys been sent packing from Hogwarts again I thought…"

Tonks laughed "No its not him, you'll never guess either"

Sirius could feel himself becoming aggravated. His eyes glinted toward Tonks "Well for gods sake woman don't hold me in suspense anymore my poor fragile mind can hardly bare it" He sounded the last few words with dire sarcasm.

Tonks pulled out a piece of parchment and handed it over "This should tell you all you need to know it's from Dumbledore. Now I must be going… Oh and Sirius why don't you get up and have a wash, maybe clean the place up a bit, under the circumstances I think it would be the right thing to do" With that she gave Sirius a wink and disapparated with a loud pop.

Sirius looked down at the parchment and began to read. After a few moments and a hasty rereading he gave a bark like laugh and stood up walking towards the window where Tonks had stood only moments before.

"So Hermione has got herself into a spot of bother and old reliable Sirius is supposed to pick up the pieces, and what? Baby-sit while the order fight on without me"

He caught himself for sounding so nasty, this was Harry's best friend after all, and Hermione had been a great friend to all of them. If she needed help the least he cold do is give it willingly. He cursed himself silently for his ever-growing bitterness at life.

Dumbledore hadn't explained fully in his note the exact reason Hermione was in need of refuge but it sounded as if she had got herself into some kind of bother, no doubt spell related and probably something to do with those Weasley boys.

He laughed again but more kindly this time while he remembered the scraps he had got into when he had been Harry's age, a marauder, always up to mischief.

He ran his fingers through his long dark hair. "Well at least its company" he began to busy himself with the horrendous task of cleaning the house.


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter three

Somewhere to go

Hermione started to dress herself slowly.

She had wanted more than anything to be able to go back to Hogwarts with Harry and Ron.

Harry and Ron had seemed apprehensive when they first entered the room at the hospital.

Of course there had been the restrained fits laughter from Ron. Harry had at least tried not to show it realising how she must be feeling instead changing the subject to how lucky she was to be able to spend some time with Sirius and how Harry himself would have gladly swapped places to spend time with his godfather.

Hermione was grateful they had come.

It was of course incredibly strange for Harry and Ron to look upon Hermione in her present full-grown state but as the hour passed it was to them as if there was no difference in her at all.

Hermione kept thinking back to when they had last been at the hospital visiting Ron's dad Mr Weasley. How incredibly long ago that now seemed. .

She had seen Ron's ears go crimson as he glanced at her now protruding chest. Harry had just shrugged it off promising Her that Dumbledore would no doubt find a reversal spell quickly.

Hermione wished with all her heart this be the case as her body and now mind began to feel strange, different somehow, like she was becoming someone else.

Of course this must be what it feels like to be a grown up Hermione had thought to herself with quite panic not sure if it was a feeling she quite relished.

The visit from Harry and Ron had ended all too soon and with promises of correspondence maybe even some floo visits they had left to catch the Hogwrats express back to school.

Hermione stood in front of a full length mirror trying in vain to adjust her T-shirt so it didn't cling quite so much, but it really didn't seem to be helping matters the more she tugged the ends the more curves seemed to appear obvious.

Hermione eventually settled for a rather large blue jumper a nurse had found for her and with that securely in place she glanced back toward mirror.

She apparently now stood at around 5'7. Her brown hair was at least down to her lower back, soft curls spilled down the sides of her face and when she brushed it back for the first time it stayed and did not revert to its all to normal bushy state.

Hermione wondered if Dumbledore would be able to let her keep this hair when she went back to her rightful age. Her teeth had been magically altered and nobody had seemed to notice so what difference would this make she pondered.

She stood back about to leave the room and realised this body, person looking back at her was her, would be her at least in a few years. Hermione smiled weakly back at herself

This really isn't too bad, I'll be back to my normal self in a few days or weeks at the most and at least I know that I'm not actually going to turn out that bad at all

With a slightly happier expression she strode out into the corridor to wait for Tonks who had readily agreed to Dumbledore to take her to Grimmauld place by tube.

Muggle transportation was a marvel to Tonks. She excitedly kept looking around at the muggles going about their daily rituals and every so often threw reassuring looks towards Hermione. "Come on now luv, Dumbledore won't leave you like this for long"

Tonks grinned again "ha at least you weren't turned into something else eh? Could be worse couldn't it"

Hermione nodded back and tried to manage a half-hearted smile. She glanced out of the dark tube window watching the station's rush past. she imagined the train ride that Harry and Ron would now be enjoying. "Tonks, I'm jus…Just feeling strange that's all. I know Dumbledore will sort this out as soon as he can, he's never let any of us down before, it's just, well strange"

Tonks placed a hand on Hermiones shoulder looking at her with such a kindly expression it made Hermione feel stupid for ever worrying.

"You'll be fine at Sirius's. He'll help you with your studies, and well, I didn't want to say this but he really needs the company. Things have been so hard for him I know he's back with us now and we are all thankful for that but he's not taking it all to well if you know what I mean"

Hermione sighed. She knew it must be incredibly hard for a man such as Sirius to be forced into hiding, then of course he had died, well at least temporarily and then there had been the dementors. How could someone, a man, go through so much and not be suffering.

"I know" Hermione said softly. " Harry has been worried about him for ages now. I'm sure if he didn't have to keep going back to the Dursleys he'd live with Sirius in a shot. Maybe I can help. Try to get him to adjust to things.

Hermione shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "I hope I don't miss too much of my studies while I'm there, Do you think Sirius can really teach me"

Tonks grinned broadly again and gave a hearty laugh "Sirius was top in all his studies Hermione. Don't you be troubling yourself with that. Yes… as I remember him, Remus and James, they were always in trouble for this and that but their studies never suffered. I was always a little envious really" She smiled wistfully as if her mind were back in the past re running old scene's.

Hermione eased slightly "I bet they were great to be friends with. I wonder if it's a little like how its been with myself and Harry, Ron and the others"

Hermione suddenly felt a little sad remembering how most of the old order were now either dead or in St. Mungos's. Her problem seemed to be pretty insignificant compared to all that was going on around them "You know something Tonks? I'm not going to let this bring me down anymore! I will get through this and help Sirius as much as I can"

Tonks pulled herself from her reverie "Good Hermione, I know you're a strong person, Harry's been lucky to have you. And if anybody can bloody well get Sirius out of his depression, well I'm sure you have a good as chance as any. Don't forget we will all be stopping in to keep you up to date on things" she said the last part in a whisper "If there's any news you two will know, I promise"

They both sat back and spent the last part of the journey in silence as if both were contemplating their futures.

Hermione hadn't been back to Grimmauld place in a while and had almost forgotten its enchanted entrance. Tonks strode up to the door and left Hermione slightly behind.

Tonks knocked loudly on the door and waited.

Hermione began to feel a little uneasy. She didn't really know anything about Sirius, Yes he was Harry's godfather and she and Harry had helped him escape with the time turner, and yes they had all stayed here before, but that was different. But to now be living in the same house alone together would all most certainly be strange. She took a deep breath as the large old dirty front door opened

Sirius had managed a wash and his normally straggly hair was for the most part looking halfway to normal. He still had traces of his darkly attractive looks about him, even though the last few years had served to drain his very soul the old doggishly handsome traits were still visible to the observer.

Tonks walked in past Sirius giving approving glances around and stumbled over the hall rug. Sirius smiled and turned back towards Hermione who had entered quickly behind Tonks closing the door firmly behind her. She stood still with her hands half hugging herself as to cover her now adult body, a feeling of immense embarrassment seemed to envelope her.

He looked at her for what seemed like an age and finally spoke "I thought you were bringing Hermione…." He stopped mid speech. "Hermione? Is that you"

Tonks placed a large bag down and looked at them both with a smile. "Yes that's Hermione. You see why Dumbledore has asked you to take her in for a spell"

Sirius glanced back toward Hermione who now had a uncomfortable look on her face. "It's good to see you Hermione, I just didn't recognise you for a moment. Ageing spell I take it"

Hermione looked to Tonks for help "Er yes, well no actually it was a potion. And I…" she trailed off and Tonks spoke up again. "Yes unfortunate, but cant be helped at the moment. Hermione ran into a friend of Dumbledore's at the ministry and got covered in this potion he was carrying. Well, as you see Dumbledore cant let her back at Hogwarts until its been reversed and that might not be for a while"

Hermione looked distraught and anxious "Can I go to my room? I'm feeling tired and well its been a long day…a very long day"

She walked forward to Sirius and gave him a small hug "its good to see you, Harry sends his love and wishes he could be here too…" she trailed off again.

Sirius looked a little unnerved but returned the hug. He stood back and griped her shoulders lightly and smiled at her "Look don't worry about it. Dumbledore will fix this and until then we will do what we can to keep up your studies"

He released his grip and looked toward the stairs "just take any room you want, the one you stayed in before with Ginny is probably best…Well cleanest at any rate"

Hermione relaxed slightly and picking up her bag she stepped toward Tonks and gave her a hug too "Thank you for talking to me earlier, I will be fine I promise. Will you explain it all to him, I'm too tired to go into it all again… I just want to sleep for a while" she said looking toward the still somewhat stunned Sirius.

Tonks returned the hug and "Of course why don't you just get some rest. I'll be back when I can to see how it's all going"

Hermione smiled weakly and walked up the stairs clutching her books and bag's against her chest trying desperately not to cry.

Tonks and Sirius retreated to the kitchen and Tonks explained the situation in great detail.

" So she knows it was something the ministry have been working for the order then" Sirius asked with a seriousness that accompanied most of his words these days.

Tonks nodded "yes, but she doesn't know what the potion is being made for exactly, poor girl … well come to think of it none of us do apart from Dumbledore and Armagould, that's the wizard who's designing it"

Sirius looked at Tonks for a moment contemplating "She's still a child though? Just trapped in a grown body. It's still the Hermione that we all know? A what? Sixteen year old girl? And Dumbledore thought that it would be appropriate for me, ME of all people to look after her"

Tonks sipped her butter beer. "Well now Sirius, Hermione is probably one of the brightest witches around these days and I doubt that Dumbledore would have sent her here if he didn't feel confident you two would be all right. And we don't really know what's going on inside her mind, maybe she has matured mentally although as I said Hermione is one of the most grown up girls I know, I'd doubt there'd be much difference now or in 6 years time so to speak, its just her appearance. And what does is matter? its Hermione, and she going to need you to help her"

Sirius snarled slightly "that's not what I meant, of course I will look after her, of course she's bright! She Harry's friend! Its just well she… she's a woman now"

He poured another drink for himself and re filled Tonks glass "I haven't had company for so long and now I'm supposed to share my house with a woman, isn't that a little inappropriate"

Tonks looked at Sirius for a long moment "Sirius for goodness sake get a grip on yourself, its Hermione. She needs your help. Things will be fine! It's not as if there is going to be anything-funny going on, She's Harry's friend. Look on her as you would Harry"

Tonks drained the last of her butter beer and went to put the glass down but accidentally let it fall to the floor instead. "Oh damn there I go again." with a flick of her wand she spoke the words "repairo" and the glass become one again.

"Look I have to be on my way now. I'll be back soon. Just crack on with her studies and try to be there if she needs to talk"

Sirius looked aghast at this "I have to talk about her feelings" he slumped in his chair "I don't even know what I'm feeling let alone what she could possibly be feeling"

Tonks said no more on the matter and disaperated in a flash.

Sirius was left alone in the kitchen of Grimmauld place decidedly feeling out of his depth.

A/N

Okay so people seem interested, that's good. I have a whole plot in mind its really not just aimless rambling… well at least I hope not.

I'm learning daily that character names, and or other Hp wordage I'm using may be wrong or misspelled so bare with me while I read mountains of other fiction in order to learn more….

I.e. My spelling of Grimmauld place is I know wrong lol so please don't slate me for that!

Damn it's a tough job but someone's got to do it.

Review and I post more.


	4. Chapter Four

Thanks for the reviews!

Please, please give me any constructive criticism or whatever! I'm open to any kind of help. I'm worrying that my characters and not in depth enough?

Thanks again to people who have taken the time to comment! Hugs!

Chapter Four

Kitchen comfort

Hermione was running through the ministry, searching desperately for answers, Some help of any kind. But there was none to be found.

Ron came towards her laughing and pointing at her breasts that now seemed to be so large she was having difficulty standing "Ron why are you laughing" Ron disappeared and was instantly replaced by Dumbledore who started doing a little dance.

"I'm dreaming" Hermione said aloud and looked around again, she saw Sirius and Tonks whispering in the shadows but when she tried to call to them they too disappeared.

Suddenly Hermione found herself in front of a huge mirror, she was naked and scared "What's going on" she cried but nobody answered. Shapes and images started to swirl uncontrollably around her and with a loud whooshing sound she sat up right.

Sweat poured from her body and the bedclothes seemed to be tied around her "Oh my goodness" she whispered looking around the room forgetting where she was for a moment.

Hermione got out of the bed shakily and wondered over to her bag. She really didn't have any clothes that fitted her now, well apart from the jeans and jumper that had been given to her earlier.

She dressed herself in the same attire and looked at the clock. "Twelve" she said aloud. Her voice seemed like a stranger and made Hermione feel even more out of place. I have to pull myself together! This is only temporary

She left the room and quietly made her way downstairs silently praying that Sirius would be asleep. She didn't know why but the thought of suddenly being completely alone with him was causing her a strange mix of emotions.

What should she say to him? Should she carry on as she normally would around him? Had been the look of stunned silence Sirius had given her earlier that was making her feel this way.

_Hermione don't be a fool, of course Sirius looked at you strangely, you don't even recognise yourself so how the hell would anyone else feel okay about this? _

She entered the kitchen, it was in darkness and she cursed herself for not bringing her wand with her. She felt feebly along the table for a candle and stooped dead. She could hear breathing. A low growl seemed to be coming from the other side of the room.

"Illumino" a voice said and the room suddenly became bright.

Hermione blinked at the brightness of the light and looked around. In the corner of the kitchen Sirius occupied a large chair. He smiled up at Hermione "Sorry, didn't mean to give you a fright. I prefer the dark sometimes…Helps me clear my mind"

Hermione look relived "That's okay, you just gave me a fright" she sat down at the other end of the table and suddenly felt like she was intruding.

She started to stand up when Sirius broke the silence once more" Look, I'm sorry if I'm not very good at this. … This talking, and being company business…. Its just, well it's been a long time and. … and I want you to feel comfortable here so ignore my behaviour. I'm just an old man with too many memories and its gets the better of me at times."

He relaxed back into his chair again. "What I'm so badly trying to say is Hermione."

He paused and looked at her with a penetrating stare "Is, Just be your self, treat this as your home for as long as you are here and if I become too cantankerous just tell me to shut up." He smiled rather sadly to himself and looked away.

Hermione felt very sad herself at this moment in time. She hadn't really realised till now how badly all this had effected Sirius, he was almost a shell of the half broken man Harry and she had rescued several years before. Now he seemed so desolate so empty it made her feel like reaching out to comfort him. She kicked herself inwardly.

_This isn't Harry, or Ron for that matter… how could I comfort him, he's been through so much, nothing I could ever say will change that…. Or make him feel better_

She tried to regain her composure. "Thank you Sirius" she rubbed her eyes and tried to straighten her still sweat soaked hair. "I'm really glad I'm here" she wondered if she sounded as fake as she felt she did.

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "Really?" he seemed to brighten. "You're not upset at missing the start of term then?"

Hermione half smiled "not really, well I was but Tonks said you would help me with my studies and as long as I don't fall behind I don't really mind where I am" she shifted in her chair again. "I mean its not like I could be back at Hogwarts like this… How would I explain."

She glanced quickly up at Sirius to catch a look of uncertainty on his half shadowy face.

" Oh I don't know anymore Sirius. I'm sick of thinking about it if you want the honest truth. Yes I want to be with my friends, be back at school…be normal again, not feel so… so damn strange and out of place! Out of place with my self, my mind, my body." She stooped dead. Realising too late what she had said.

Hermione stood abruptly. "Oh I'm sorry for the out burst its just every thing in the last few days"

Sirius said nothing. What could he say? He understood how it felt to be out of place. To no longer belong.

Hermione stretched and yawned. "Truth is I feel awful, Here I am going on about my petty problems when you.. You've had so much to deal with."

She walked towards Sirius and smiled gently. "Tomorrow is a new day for us both. If you can bare to have me here with my silliness that is?"

She looked so vulnerable for a moment that Sirius almost reached out to comfort her. He felt conflicted, and then he simply nodded back at her.

When she had left the room Sirius breathed a sigh of relief. She looked so different to the girl he knew. She smelt different, acted differently.

It was all causing him to feel a rush of emotions he had not allowed himself to feel for an age. She had felt sorry for him. That hurt. He could not allow anyone to pity him. He vowed to be different the next day. Remembering back across the years how he had been with James and Remus. The fun had long since evaded his life.

_Damn it to hell! I'm not going to let Hermione pity me! Lets see if there's not some of that old Sirius left in me somewhere shall we _

He laughed inwardly and jumped out of his chair. With a definite spring to his step he proceed onto bed.


End file.
